


Wrap Rage

by remarkable1



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Bickering, Birthday, Boys Being Boys, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Exhaustion, Friendship, Grumpiness, M/M, Minor Violence, Other, Pettiness, Punishment, Quidditch, Scheming Pepper Potts, Slightly OOC Pepper Potts, Some Humor, Supportive Ron Weasley, Tattle-Tale F.R.I.D.A.Y., Threats, Trouble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:41:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27786169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remarkable1/pseuds/remarkable1
Summary: Bucky and Ron are not amused by Pepper's punishment after they get into trouble at Morgan's birthday party.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Ron Weasley, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Susan Bones/Ron Weasley, Various friendships between Avengers and Wizarding characters
Kudos: 5
Collections: Cast the Dice 2020





	Wrap Rage

This work has been created for Facebook's Wizarding Crossover Connection's Cast The Dice 2020 Event. My roll was a small straight. I chose the trope, 'Birthday.'

The party was winding down, thank God, Morgan Stark and all of her little friends sleepy-eyed yet still hyped up from the coma-inducing amount of sugar they’d inhaled throughout the chaotic day.

Of course, Tony Stark never did anything by halves. ALL of his daughter’s friends, including the new ones they’d made overseas, had been invited. Shit. Tony had even had one of those magical do-hickey fireplaces installed, each and every one of the Brits popping out of the fire in a glow of green light like some goddamn freaky jack-in-the-box.

Still, Bucky was happy to see his good pal Ron Weasley, his wife Susan in tow. Susan was quickly swept away by the other ladies after a quick hello, and Bucky rounded up with the other guys for an indoor game of pick-up Quidditch. Well, kind of. It was an exciting job they made of it. Between the superheroes and the wizards on mixed teams, along with Stark’s state-of-the-art but scaled-down indoor Quidditch pitch, their antics were not only hilarious but injury-inducing. Hermione Granger and the current Avenger’s physician hadn’t been amused when an array of broken bones, bruises, and a cracked skull came in for sheepish repairs. A few of the kids cried at all the blood.

Hands-on her hips, Ginny Weasley, shook her head, Pepper at her side, frowning at the trail of blood while the others shooed the kids out another door for a different activity. The squeals of excitement revealed Tony’s grand finale of pony rides.

Fuck. How the hell had Tony gotten ponies all the way up to the penthouse? Buck was sure he didn’t want to know.

After a good tongue lashing, Ginny rolled her eyes and stalked away, magicking them clean, the blood gone and them smelling a lot better, sans injuries, of course.

“Well? Don’t just stand there. Tony wants everyone out for a group picture.”

The group trudged across the living area littered with bits of cake, confetti, and God knows what else five-year-olds scattered around during a party. A pile of barf _might_ have even made its way to a corner of the room. No one else saw it, but Bucky could _smell_ it.

The others filed through the door, the sound of happy squeals and one crying child, the overriding voice of a consoling mother drifted through before Pepper stepped in front of Bucky and Ron.

“Not you two. You two are _always_ the instigators.”

“I’m sorry, Pep. You know we didn’t mean to –”

“You know what? I don’t want to hear it. You said that at the last three get-togethers. It’s getting expensive cleaning up your messes. Tony may be rich and not care about the damage, but _I_ do. This is supposed to be a _children’s_ birthday party, not a free-for-all for grown men.”

Ron hung his head like a little boy and scuffed the carpet with his trainer. “Aw. C’mon. We didn’t mean it.”

With a frown, Pepper turned to Bucky, catching him elbowing Ron in an attempt to get him to shut up.

“And YOU!” Pepper pointed.

Bucky’s eyebrows rose, and his metal hand pointed at his chest, mouthing, ‘me?’

“Yes, you. YOU should know better. You know the rules. So, since you two seem to always say sorry to my face and then ignore me the next time everyone’s having fun, you get to clean up the mess. NO MAGIC!” she added, snatching Ron’s wand from his hand as he tried to protest.

His mouth snapped shut when she gave him the patented ‘Pepper Potts Glare of Death.’

“I also want ALL of the presents opened and the toys assembled by the time we’re done here. Kapeesh?”

“Yes ma’am,” the men answered, well, mumbled, but it was good enough for her.

As an added insult, she narrowed her eyes and addressed the A.I. “FRIDAY, make sure they don’t leave until this room is up to my standards, and all the gifts are assembled. And.. while you’re at it, lock the liquor cabinets.”

Bucky clenched his teeth but didn’t say anything, Pepper just giving him a knowing smirk and a raised brow as the A.I. acknowledged her, swanning out of the room and locking it behind her.

Bucky wanted to murder Ron. “This was YOUR idea, punk!” he hissed, bending down to start picking up the stray wrapping.

“Oi! I think not, mate! ‘Let’s do that quidditch thing!’ you said. ‘It’ll be fun!’ you said. ‘Just a quick pick up game,’ you said. Oi. Now, look what you got us into. I’ve had enough cleaning for a lifetime between me mum and Susan always nagging at me.”

“Don’t even go there, Red,” Bucky warned. It actually didn’t take them too long to clean up when they quite bickering like an old married couple and got to work.

The presents, however, were another story.

The pony rides had wound down, and Pepper had managed to usher everyone out through a different exit, ponies and all, giving the two men a warning pointer finger, bringing her index and middle fingers to her eyes and back to them several times in an, ‘I’m watching you,’ capacity, then turned and left with the rest.

Apparently, she had given them grace on the time frame she’d originally set, probably too tired to deal with them further while dealing with departing guests and an exhausted birthday girl.

“Damn. You know she’s gonna blow if we don’t finish this.”

“Mate. This should be a breeze. Putting together a few toys ain’t no big deal, you know?”

Bucky just shook his head. He supposed Ron was right.

Getting to work, Bucky grabbed the first one in the huge pile. It was some sort of – well – he couldn’t tell, really. Starting to easily tear off the cardboard's edges, he quickly came to a set of ties on the bottom with tape securely sealed over them. He tried to peel the toy parts from the package, and it wouldn’t come off.

“What the fuck is this?”

“Looks like they secure the parts to the packaging. You don’t see that in wizarding stores, but I’ve seen some like that when Harry bought some for our nieces and nephews. He used a cutting tool to get them open. When Gin tried to use magic, it just wrapped them tighter. I think they’re cursed.”

“No. Sadistic would be a better word. Pepper KNEW we were gonna hate this. That’s why she’s making us do it.”

Bucky worked in vain to pull apart the infuriating ties. Ron seemed to be having similar difficulty but better success. He got one toy apart from its prison-like confines and put it together while Bucky was still on his first package.

“I’m a fucking enhanced soldier with a cybernetic arm. Why the fuck can’t I get this apart?”

“You have to be careful, mate or the ties are gonna break off the toy parts.”

“Shit. This looks expensive, too.”

“’ Course it is. It’s a Stark party. What else did you expect?”

Bucky looked at the packaging in misery. This was gonna take all night at the rate they were going.

Resigned to slowing down, he carefully picked apart the tape, untwisted the ties one by one with his super-strong fingers, and finally, _FINALLY_ got the first toy apart. Now, the assembly. He unwrapped the directions and groaned. “For fuck’s sake!” he cried. “This is gonna take forever!”

Ron shrugged. “You haven’t been around women much, have you?”

Bucky glared at him again. “This is not funny.”

“Didn’t say it was. I just expect it, that’s all. You should’ve known what was coming.”

“You _KNEW_ this was gonna get us in this much shit?”

“Yeah. That’s half the fun. The challenge of it, you know? Shenanigans ain’t no fun if you don’t piss’em off once in a while.”

Bucky’s hands were at Ron’s neck in a flash, the redhead scrabbling for purchase against the metal-plated fingers.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” he gasped, fingers frantically clawing at the tight grip around his throat.

The A.I. beeped a warning it was about to alert Pepper.

Growling under his breath, Bucky dropped his second-best-friend and resumed the tedious task of assemblage. “These parts are so fucking small hydra wouldn’t know what to do with them.”

“What’s a Hydra?” Ron asked absently.

“Nevermind. And DON’T talk to me! I’m mad at you!”

“Oi. Bloody cool your broom. Fine.”

In a petulant move, Bucky picked up his pile and scooted down several chairs, muttering uncharitable epithets under his breath as he went.

“FRIDAY, can we get some music or T.V. or somethin’ in here? If this is gonna take all night, I need something to distract me.”

“I’m sorry, sir. Ms. Potts has instructed me to –”

“Fine, yah yeah, whatever,” Bucky interrupted. “I get the picture.”

“We can sing if you like?” Ron offered.

Bucky flicked him the middle finger, and Ron laughed.

An undefined number of hours later, the two men lay slumped together, back to back on the floor. Pepper snuck in as quietly as she could, inspecting the area. She was quite pleased to see everything had been assembled, and the assorted bits of garbage disposed of.  
Bucky’s eyes snapped open, then he closed them again sleepily.

“Have you learned your lesson?” Pepper teased, sticking her finger in her mouth, the swirling it in Bucky’s ear. She leapt away as he reached out with a lazy swipe. 

“Gross, Pep.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I’m fuckin’ tired. Didn’t know toys were worse torture than what I already went through.”

She helped Weasley up and through the Floo, him stumbling through to a scolding Susan, an excuse already tumbling off his lips as the connection closed.

Holding her hand out to Bucky, she helped him up, although he clearly didn’t need it, and he gave her a wry smirk. Dark circles were under his eyes and he closed them. “Sorry, Pep. I’ll keep Ron outta trouble next time.”

“No, you won’t. But that’s alright. We wouldn’t have you guys any other way. I’d steer clear of Granger, though, she’s fast with that wand. Molly told me about the hexes she used to throw at her boys when they pissed her off enough.”

“Thanks for the warning. ‘Night. I never wanna see another damn toy in my entire life.”

Ruefully rubbing his backside from having fallen asleep on the hard floor and remembering quite well what a stinging hex to the rear felt like, he wandered to bed.

Pepper clapped her hands and smiled. “I’ll have to do that again. Those two were pretty good getting it all done in one night. I’ll have to make Tony set up more opportunities to get them into trouble next year, too. I wonder if I can have him add an electronic score board to the indoor Quidditch pitch?”


End file.
